Choosing to adopt: One couple’s story

By Tricia Goyer
Nov 1, 2013

TRICIA: John and I always told ourselves it was a good thing we had kids while we were young, that way we’d still be young when they were out of the house. We made lot of plans, to travel, to enjoy quiet evenings together, to have a clean house not cluttered with toys.

Then I saw a magazine article about orphans, and that got me thinking about adding another child to our home. John wasn’t interested when I first mentioned it. I didn’t prod. Instead I just prayed. I didn’t know if it was God’s plan for our family that God would bring both of our hearts into agreement. He did. We didn’t get the China baby we first planned on, but we have three new Goyers in our home. We don’t travel as much as we like. We are exhausted during the evenings. And the house is cluttered with toys. But we stepped out and followed God’s call, and we couldn’t imagine life without these kids.

JOHN: We never had that empty nest feeling in our home. When Tricia and I started dating, there was already a baby in tow. Those “easy to get away for the weekend” adventures were something other people got to enjoy. I will admit I was looking forward to those days. I love the kids, but I really longed for the ease of the empty nest. Since we would be in our forties when the last one left for college, we would still be young enough to enjoy an easier life of a smaller home, smaller cars, and less to arrange when we want to play on the weekend.

Then I felt conviction about that attitude. God did not call me to a life of ease. We get one shot at this life, to make a difference in the lives of others. Following a hedonistic philosophy of pleasing myself does not honor God or the sacrifice he made for me. God placed a new desire in my heart. True worship is this: to care for the widow and the orphan. So now we have Tricia’s grandma in our home and three little ones. They are work, and they are joy, and they are an opportunity to share the love of the Father to those who need someone who will get out of their easy chair and love.

TRICIA: Have you thought about adoption? If so, it’s time to pray. Maybe God put the desire on your heart for a reason. Choosing to adopt is a huge step and a huge responsibility. It’s also an amazing blessing. I can’t imagine life without our kids. They have the same place in my heart as our biological ones.

After you pray, wait and see what God brings into your path. For our first adopted daughter, God connected us with a birth mom through a mutual friend. For our other two kids we kept hearing about adopting from the foster care system over and over and over. And the very day I’d planned to talk to John about it, but he brought it up first.

Open your heart, seek unity with your spouse, and be willing to let God work. There is a reason He’s tapping you on the shoulder, wanting you to pay attention.

JOHN: There are a million reasons why adopting a child or two is a bad idea. Maybe you don’t feel you can financially afford it. Maybe you feel inadequate. Maybe you are just afraid of the unknown. Maybe a minivan will mess up your image. None of those reasons are reasons God would give you. Listen to the heart of God. The one who desires the best for you and the best for those waiting for their forever-home. Following God in the tug God is placing in your heart will be the best thing for the child and ultimately for you as well. This is an exclusive offer. Act now! Children are standing by.

Further Learning

Learn more about: Family, Children, Parenting, Adoption, Life,

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